It's Day 16, and Someone Activated My Activist Button

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

The religious extremists on campus perhaps?

I protested against them today for 5+ hours between and after my classes. I ended up getting interviewed by news channel 3, so we'll see if I end up on tv.

Check out the pictures!

I loved this guy!

It's awesome, isn't it?

Pretty much what most people on campus were thinking.

This is freak numero uno and the poor girl he kept calling an anorexic prostitute.

Some students called their pastor to come and preach both for and against the two freaks - right after this, he started a rendition of Amazing Grace.

The guy with the beard next two freak #1 is a Nazi who was yelling in German.

Today freak #2's wife and young daughter were not excluded from the drinking of the kool-aid ceremony like they were yesterday. P.S. The kid was truant from school.

He also had a sign that advertised he was giving out free hugs.

This guy changed into a ninja outfit and played Amazing Grace on his recorder.

I loved my sign.

As far as my classes go, today I had:

English Composition - Mr. Schulz is really sweet. He seems a bit timid. I overheard him telling another instructor that it was his first day right before class started, so I'm sure he was a little nervous. Hopefully we weren't too intimidating! I think his class will be a good one!

Values In The Modern World - LOVE IT, PEOPLE! I absolutely L.O.V.E. it! Mrs. Botts is amazing. A mutual friend of ours, Amy, was right when she said I'd enjoy her class. I cannot wait to go back Thursday. This class has deepened my love for philosophy already. :)


I also dropped Fundamental Issues. I decided it was going to be too much to try and take on two philosophy classes this semester. I mixed up my books, my teachers' names, etc. They are very different and are teaching different aspects of philosophy - it was a situation of confusion waiting to happen.

On Day 15, God Created the First Day of Classes AND Religious Extremists

We have more important things to talk about, so let's just get the blog program out of the way.

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Flip flops and caffeine.


TODAY was the first day of my classes. It finally happened, YO! [That's my shout out to Elokin who listened to me bitch about our dorm's lack of water due to plumbing problems and contamination which, by the way, now seems to be fixed.] Anyway, I had three classes today.

Survey of Mass Communication - Enter Professor? Dr.? Ms.? Miller (she didn't specify), a blonde woman of average height who is kind of on the skinny side. She's older. Not old, just older. Maybe 50. She was fun to be around and had decent energy. She talks fast, and at some point in the next few weeks, I guarantee you that I'll be asking her to slow down. But she's really nice, so I doubt she will object. She likes for her class to be talkative People interject and talk freely. She is obviously wise because she can comfortably laugh at herself. I loved her class before I got there.

Fundamental Issues/Philosophy - Mr. Allen who is very tall forgot to bring his dry erase markers. To be honest, this was about the most interesting thing that happened the entire time. Don't get me wrong - he's nice, and I think I'll really enjoy his class. It's just that he doesn't have his introduction fine-tuned yet. He ended up scaring me half-way through class when he said that philosophy papers look nothing like anything we've ever written before. He'll be teaching us how to write them - that's not the problem. The deal is, he said it was harder for writers to get the system down because nothing can be poetic - it has to be straight forward. But I could stand to use fewer flowery lines in my writing and to be a little more straight forward, so this class will probably help me with that.

American Government - Of all my classes, I expected this one to be the most boring. WRONG! Dr. Thomas is absolutely hilarious! He has more energy than any teacher I've ever had. He was all over the place. Out of nowhere, at the beginning of class he randomly played the theme from Star Wars. He joked, he laughed, and he danced. Yes, danced. But not to the Star Wars theme. He told us about what happens when you're phone goes off in class - he dances. So, of course, someone purposely played one of their ringtones, and Dr. Thomas got jiggy with it. He then asked us what a good reason for missing class would be, and the same guy answered, "Your grandma got run over by a train, and then when you found out, you fell down an escalator." That only asked more from Dr. Thomas, who I have decided I absolutely adore. I can't wait to get back to his class.


When I first got to my AG class, I heard some people talking about someone who was preaching on campus. They didn't say too much about it, but after class, I saw it going on outside. I stopped to watch, and that guy was a hot mess. He was standing on a chair in mis-matched clothes and an ugly hat yelling about how he was a preacher and was completely perfect. Apparently, everyone else was messed up and chose to be that way. One of his fellow nutjobs was standing close by filming it. They wore religious t-shirts and buttons that declared their hatred for sin and porn. From the responses I heard in the crowd, it seemed like they had probably made some racist comments. I ran into my friend, Abbe, and we hung out for a few minutes listening to his stupidity. It was good to see her, but I'm hoping that the next time we get to hang out we have better entertainment.

I met a guy while waiting in line at the Bursar's Office to get my student ID recoded. He started talking to me, and I wish he had never stopped. He could have talked all day about anything, and I would have listened. I really, really hope I run into him again soon.

Day 14

Our water came back on today. Due to contamination, we are not allowed to use it. No bathroom breaks. No hand-washing. No showers. The building is starting to smell pretty gross, and it's not because of the plumbing problems.

My suitemates chilled out, at least for now. I never talked to my RA about them today, but if they start acting psycho again tonight, I'll be banging on her door most definitely.

I met someone I really like today. I gave her my number, and I hope she calls.

College life is amazing so far, with the exception of the suitemate issue last night and the plumbing stuff. But there are always bumps in the beginning, right?

Classes start tomorrow, and I cannot wait! This is really exciting and just a tiny bit overwhelming. It's going to be an amazing experience. "Going to be"? I guess it already IS!

I'm off to my floor meeting... so I'll leave you with the blog program.




Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)


Dear Britney Spears,

When I was eight, I equated you with God. You're really skanky and kind of stupid. Your ignorance made my long-lasting awkward years even harder. And yet, I am still guilty of listening to your songs even to this day. SIGH.


Paula

I'm Baaack! [Day 13]

So in case you haven't noticed, my blog hasn't been updated for about a week. I didn't have access to the internet, and to be honest, I wouldn't have had the time to blog even if I had.

I moved! I'm living on campus now at the University of Memphis, and I love it! I feel like so much stress has been removed from my life, and it is a wonderful feeling! Classes start Monday, and I'm more anxious than afraid. I'll be more than okay. In other words - I got this.

Anyway, I finally figured out how to connect to the internet on campus. This is especially exciting for me because I feel like I've been cut off from the entire world for a week.

I love my pillow! It's long. It's strong. It's... not a Sir Mix-A-Lot song. I mean it, though. I bought what I think is called a body pillow, and it makes me smile that oooh-it's-so-soft smile. All of you should add them to your wishlists!(Remember my shout out to the fabric softener? My box of Bounce Outdoor Fresh is currently making my once gag-inducing closet smell AWESOME. I told y'all it smelled good!) Dorm or not - hell, bed or not - get one!

I was planning on unpacking everything today, and technically, I suppose I did - if you count midnight until 2:30 in the morning. I literally could NOT sleep with all those boxes piled around my room, and my roommate didn't sleep in our room last night... so I decided I would just get up and start working on getting it together. Currently, it's a little messy and could use a little work, but that will come with time.

Today, our water went out and one of the two elevators broke down. The one that ran the entire time is the one that I've been worrying about - it just seems shaky. If this is a sign of what is to come, I'm sure this will be an interesting year full of many different kinds of learning experiences!

The light above my bed has a K-97 sticker on it on which someone wrote Ludacris' name. Obviously, this light was destined to be mine.

My roommate hasn't been here except to move some of her stuff in yesterday, so we haven't gotten to spend any time getting to know each other yet. Judging from our conversations on facebook chat, I think we're going to get along really well. Our suitemates have yet to meet either of us, but from what I've learned from hearing their constant cuss/yell combo, they have already decided they do not like - scratch that - they have already decided they hate us. Also, they're pissed off because I turned the thermostat temperature up to 62 this morning when I couldn't handle their chosen setting of 55 anymore.

I think this is going to be a very good - and very cold - year.




Going back to my blogging program and picking up where I left off, today is day 13.

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)


Dear Train,

I love you, and that's really all I can say.

Paula

Yesterday Was Day 12...

So after I got back from Mississippi yesterday, I found out I didn't have to pick the boys up from school. I decided to turn off my phone and computer and ignore technology for a while. It was really nice. Oh, and I actually got a few things packed!

I move in less than a week, people! LESS THAN ONE WEEK. Those words sound so fantastic.

Brandon and I got offered internships with Rebuild Government - SO exciting! We have orientation Monday night. Word on the street is, they're flexible and work around your schedule - even more exciting!




Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.

My skin - I am plagued with minor acne issues.

Day 11 Is Just, Well... Day 11

Today was a decent day, not too full or too empty. It was kind of nice. :)

I shopped a little and went through some of the stuff in my room. I have so much packing to do that it is ridiculous! My belongings have completely taken over an entire bedroom at my Nana and Papa's house. Granted, it's a tiny bedroom that already had a lot of space taken up with furniture, but still... that's enough to make me realize how close I am to actually moving!

I'm so beyond excited right now! I move a week from tomorrow!! Only 8 more days until my life can FINALLY begin!

I didn't have the boys this afternoon, and I miss the little stinkers. Tomorrow we're supposed to be going to the park when I pick them up from school, so hopefully it won't be raining.



Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

My eyes, my hair, and [weirdly enough] my hands.

Day 10... Is Almost Over?

Today was just... nuts.

I'm not mad at anyone or giving up on anything, y'all. I'm still excited about school and moving, and I wish it'd hurry up and get here.

I'm tired, and I kind of want to go shopping again. Obviously, I should NOT be rethinking that credit card decision.

Drew and Blake both had a great day at school. Drew finished his project, and I think it looks great. Blake made a telephone with the leftover poster board. Then we wrote down our hopes and dreams, and Drew actually had one today. To call me a proud aunt would be an understatement. We're going to surprise their mom with them when she gets home. :)


Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

Too many people to count.

Day 09 Is Just Really NOT My Day...

As you can tell from the title of this blog post, I haven't had the most spectacular day. I'm exhausted and sick of driving all over Greater Memphis to shop - not that I did much shopping. Oh, and to top it all off, half a gallon of bleach got spilled in my backseat.

To say that I'm completely pissed off would be quite the understatement, and to tell you the truth, it's not so much that I'm mad about the bleach being spilled. I'm mad because the person who spilled it didn't apologize and couldn't seem to care less that she has forever ruined the upholstery in my car.

But you know what? I'll get over it. Friendship is a lot more important than car upholstery. And it could just be that she doesn't know what to say - we've all been there.

My schedule is crazy right now, and it seems like people are constantly trying to get me to do stuff with them. I will admit very quickly that I have issues with turning people down. It's my fault that my schedule is too full. But at the same time that I'm blaming myself, I can't help but blame them a little, too. People these days are so rude when you do it that sometimes I'm too afraid of their attitudes to say no to them. So that's something I should work on - not caring.




Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.


My friends from middle school? I don't know.

It's Day 08, and I'm Worn Out... and Happy!

Monterica and I shopped for over 4 hours. It wasn't light shopping. I'm talking hardcore, we-meant-business shopping. Then we came back to Whit's house to cool off and have lunch before picking up the boys from school. They both had good days, and we've had a pretty peaceful afternoon. Soon, we'll be shopping again. It's not that I don't like shopping. Actually, I love it.

My problem is that I never sleep anymore. I was still tired when I got up this morning, and now I'm completely exhausted. I keep saying that I never realized how much work it was just to get ready for college. There's so much to do and buy, and sometimes I don't think I'll ever get finished.

On the plus side, today I got some REALLY cute shoes that were originally $70 for only $12! I was definitely born to shop! :)



Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap.

Repeat after me: birth mother.

A Day of Rest... Except Without the Resting - Days 06 & 07

I didn't blog Saturday. I'm declaring yesterday my official "day of rest" - not that I ever actually rested. I shopped all day, settled for surviving all afternoon, and partied like it was 2009 all night. With the exception of the rough afternoon, it turned out to be a pretty decent day. Today was very similar, and it was crazy, too.

I absolutely cannot wait to move! 12 days, people! And considering that it's getting close to 10pm, it's actually closer to 11 days. I am SO excited! I can't wait to start school either. This is what I've spent my entire life waiting for - I can't believe it's finally happening. I AM SO FREAKIN' THRILLED ABOUT ALL OF IT! Except all the money I'm spending - I could do without that.

I bought what I am now considering to be THE MOST IMPORTANT ITEM for my dorm room today - Bounce [outdoor fresh!] dryer sheets. My moms use that as their fabric softener, and I LOVE how it smells. Whenever I hug them, I just can't get over how good it smells. So I bought some. I don't ever want to buy any other kind. It's my new favorite scent. I never thought I'd love fabric softener enough to give it an entire section in a blog post, but here I am... and boy does it smell good! :)



Time for the blogging plan! Yesterday was day 06 & today is day 07.


Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

I hope I never have to lose another person I'm extremely close to. Honestly, I almost didn't make it through losing Mandi. I don't know if I could handle that again.


Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.

Easy peasy, lemon squeezey. My mommies!

Day 05 & People Who Have Redecorated My Brain

Before I get into my actual blog post today, I'm going to get the section I reserve for my blog plan out of the way. Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Hm... this is hard because there are a lot of things I want to do before I die. I don't have a bucket list or anything, but I have a few things noted in my head that I'd like to see happen. If I'm just naming one - I want to be a mom. There - I said it. I've already blogged about being teased by my friends for being overly maternal. The truth is, I've always wanted to be a mom. Like I tried to explain in a previous post, I have loved children for longer than I can remember. Back in the day, I wanted to have children and give them everything my birth mother never gave me. These days, I want to be a mom and give my children everything that my adoptive mothers HAVE given me. Except my children will have a little bit more - they'll have two adoring grandmas to love them, too.



The idea for today's blog comes from my friend Katie who blogged about ageism and friends, and she included pictures and descriptions of people who had inspired her and changed her life, most [if not all] of whom were older or younger than her. I'm not going to get into talking about ageism - you'd never shut me up. I will, however, steal the second half of her blog idea.

"Some friends change your whole world. They make you reimagine your life. They redecorate your brain." -Katie Jones DePalma

In third grade, I thought Ms. Renfrow [now Mrs. Ables] hung the moon. She made school wonderful for me, and she made my especially difficult life a little more bearable. Even after I moved up a few grades, she still always made time to visit with me at school. After my sixth grade year, she left and went to teach at a different school and I went on to middle school, so we lost touch. Fast forward six big years - I say big because a LOT happened during those years [I basically grew up, while she was getting married and having three children] - I ran into her at Jerry's Sno Cones recently and got caught up. She might have been 25 when I was 8, but I will never stop believing that our bond was stronger than in a typical teacher-student relationship.

us at Jerry's, July 2010

Middle school was really hard for me. Another teacher came along and befriended me - Ms. McClanahan. She was my English teacher, but she made me want to do my best in everything, both in and outside of school. I hung out in her room after school every day until she left, just talking to her about whatever was going on with the two of us. For a few years, I would go back and visit before school started and spend a day or two helping her get her room decorated and ready to go. We shared so many special moments.

Ms. McClanahan on vacation in 2009

After finishing eighth grade, I had my first Tennessee Young Writers' Workshop [TYWW] summer experience, where I had the absolute honor of becoming friends with Katie Jones [now DePalma]. I feel like Katie and I had that kind of instant bond that just happens. She is an incredible person. There's no one I'd rather hug. We keep up with each other on facebook, but to be honest, we don't talk as much as I wish we did. But this is the 21st century - our schedules are insanely busy, and that's okay. We talk when we need to, and when we do, we pick up where we left off.

Katie and I, July 2008

still July 2008, but this time we're in our more natural states

Out of nowhere, my two adoptive moms came into my life, and I am so glad. They might be my mothers, but we are most definitely friends. I would rather talk to them than anyone else. It's like we have a real-life Gilmore Girls thing going on, except now there are two Lorelais... which is AWESOME.

Mom and Mama, 2010

Dana is like a sister to me. I had the same kind of instant bond with her that I had with Katie. We are the weirdos that look at each other and wink at the same exact time. I call her Damien and say she's almost too gay to function [Mean Girls reference, anyone?]. She calls me by my middle name and tells me I'm pretty. Her being older than me has never stopped us from being friends. But really, she's more like a soul sister to me.

blurry picture of Dana and I from July, 2010

Dana, August 2010

***I only used people who are currently living in my post. For instance, my big sister [best friend] was left out because she is no longer living. I don't know why - I guess maybe I just wanted this to be a lighter, non-depressing blog. Also, if you weren't mentioned, it doesn't mean you haven't changed my life or that I don't love you. That's not the case at all. Everyone I meet changes my life in some way. These are just the people who have "redecorated my brain" as Katie would put it. :)

Day 04 = 12 Hours Overdue... But Y'all Will Live and I Will, Too.

I had a really fun day yesterday hanging out at Monterica's house with her, her cousin, and her 2 y/o niece (and later a couple of her friends from high school).

Then I had the fantastic night I've been waiting for all week - I finally got to see my favorite California cousin, Jessi! I hardly ever get to see her (maybe once every 2-3 years?), so every moment is a treasured one. We got to hang out with the gang last night, and it was a very enjoyable evening. I was excited when I got to spend a few minutes alone with her, and we talked about, well, a bunch of random [but cool] stuff. I think we're a lot more alike than I ever realized, even just in our attitudes toward different things.

Jessi likes Kat Von D and promised to go with me if I get in to see her when I visit California. I know, right?! I think my love for her doubled, possibly even tripled, when she said that.

After we hung out, I had some more important things to get done when I got home before I went to bed, so my blog didn't get posted last night. It's a little late, but I'm not upset about it. If you are, we should probably have a quick conversation about the issues you're facing... or a long one, depending on the number of issues.

For a good while, I've been wanting to go to California to visit for a couple of weeks. I know people that are kind of spread out from SoCal to the middle of the state, and when I go I want to stay for a while and see all of them - in other words, I'll get to see several people and a LOT of California. Now I seriously can't wait to go... anybody got a couple thousand dollars they don't want anymore?



Day 04 of my blogging plan: something you have to forgive someone for.

Eventually, I have to forgive B for being such an idiot. Notice I said, "eventually."

I Love My Moms... and Day 03.

I waited a long time for them (roughly 18 years), but I have the best two mothers on the planet. Seriously. I'm always glad they're in my life and am appreciative for the things they do on a DAILY basis for me, but on days like today, I'm extra grateful. Whenever I have a problem, one or both of them is right there to help me... always. They genuinely care, and I can't tell you how much time they've spent just listening to me when I needed someone to talk to. I could never ask for anything or anyone better - and that's good, because it doesn't exist.


Family - a social unit consisting of one or more adults together with the children they care for.

Mother - something or someone that gives rise to or exercises protecting care over something else.

"Ohana means family. Family means no one gets left behind... or forgotten."
-Lilo & Stitch


Dear Mom and Mama,


Thank you for giving me a true-to-definition family, for being my mothers (again, true-to-definition), and for never leaving me behind. I love you more than you will ever know.


Paula




According to the plan, the topic today is: something I have to forgive myself for.

Ooh, that's hard. I guess more than anything, I have to forgive myself for being naive when I was younger (like say, 14 maybe) - or rather, I should forgive myself for things that I did when I was much more naive because I was younger. I went through a period of time where I made some really bad decisions for myself, and it all started in November of 2006 - my freshman year of high school. The beginning of it was in no way related to school or any of my friends from school, but needless to say, I still wound up with a reputation. At this point, I still haven't forgiven myself for it, and I should - if for no other purpose than being able to move on.

[Day 02] All Sorts of Things Are Happening...

Today has been a mixture of many things. I've been hanging out with my friend, Monterica, and watching my nephew, Blake, all day. We took Blake with us to run some errands and came back to his house. After some play time and an episode of Scooby Doo, we went to Burger King. Then on the way back home, we stopped by Snowden to visit for a little bit, and we introduced Blake to some of our old teachers. He really enjoyed himself, and to be honest, we loved it. I have been missing Snowden a lot lately, and it was wonderful to have the opportunity to visit again. It was also quite funny - most of my old teachers thought Blake was my son, instead of my nephew! That was pretty hilarious.

Stopping by Snowden made me feel so much older. Of course, having people mistake my six year old nephew for my son made me feel pretty old, too! But really - having so many people ask me what I'm doing "now" was thought-provoking. This is now and that was then, and by now, then was so long ago that it's not relevant anymore - confusing, I know, but work with me here. Monterica and I were also talking about how old we thought we were in eighth grade. Today we saw many eighth graders, and every single one of them looked so young - they looked 13. Even though I feel old (and at times, consider myself to be so), I'm STILL young. I have so much to learn and so much left to do in my lifetime. Being young, contrary to popular belief, doesn't mean I'm stupid and certainly doesn't lessen my worth. Enjoying my youth doesn't make me a bad person, nor does it mean I'm immature - those are completely separate choices.

It is true that my age is getting to be a larger number all the time. I remember being four and thinking I would never be an adult. My childhood years have come to pass, and I don't feel any different. Age really is just a number... and, for most people, the grass is just as green on one side as it is on the other.



Number 02 on my blogging plan: Something I love about myself.

I love my heart. I legitimately try my hardest to be as nice to others as I can be, and I feel like I genuinely love people more than the "Average Joe".

I also love that I'm so maternal. People have always laughed at me for it, but I enjoy being that way. I like that I look out for my friends and that I enjoy being around children. That's who I am and always will be... and, unlike a lot of people, I don't consider it to be a bad thing.

Starting This Blog; Day 01

I'm easing myself into blogging with a 30-day blogging program that I got from my friend Lorie. Eventually, I want to turn my blog into a place for my daily thoughts. Follow me! :)

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.



Going along with the plan, I'll start with day 01 - something I hate about myself.


I hate that I have a really low self-esteem. I've been working on it for a while, and with the addition of some really wonderful people in my life, it has gotten a lot better over the past several months. However, it still needs a lot of work.